Thus Spake An Inert Rebel

Taking the RTE seriously

noreply@blogger.com (mutRupuLLi) — Thu, 13 Aug 2009 07:00:00 +0000

Critics may tell what they want, but India is taking the Right To Education very seriously. So seriously that I fear that we are taking it farther than "where no man has ever gone before". In fact we should be renaming it the "Duty to Education" or rather "Duty to go to school". What else can we call the plea of our politicians to not close schools, even if it meant exposing the ultra vulnerable GenY,GenZ,Gen omega, Gen lambda etc to the dreaded "swine flu". I mean one should appreciate people for their concern that many Indian school children may spend their time going to parties and socialising right left and centre if they don't go to school. I mean what other job does the GenY,GenZ,Gen omega, Gen lambda in an ultra poor country have. I fully understand the logic.

But why should we crib about exposing a particularly age group to the swine. Our bank staff have the onerous job of striking as frequently as MTC bus breakdowns and further spend their time watching the classic "india tolaikatchyil muthan muraiaga" movies on krishna jaynthi, aadi ammavasai, avani avittam and the other extremely important religious festival days. And the government staff obviously have more important jobs than working at their desks, to which no one in the right minds will object. If all this has to happen who will lead the country to 2020. What ever will happen to Dr Abdul Kalam's dream.

So all those who demand that schools be closed, just acknowledge that there is superior logic at work and shut up. Period.

What shall I be ?

noreply@blogger.com (mutRupuLLi) — Tue, 26 May 2009 09:08:00 +0000

I used to have this CBT(maybe NBT) book titled "What shall I be". It was one of my favourites in the bygone days when I had more hair and less opinions. A young kid ponders over the various kinds of professions he can take up, typically the jobs of an engineer, doctor, astronaut and a few other stuff. And typically the father advises him to study hard for the moment and do the dreaming later. And typically I hated the father. The jobs I never intended to pursue were that of the doctor and engineer. The Doctor set I used to have as a child singularly failed to fascinate me. And I suspect most kids just liked the syringe injecting part in the doctors profession (provided it is not injected into them). A Gandhian disdain for violence and the absence of a good syringe in my doctor set meant that I never fancied myself as a doctor. Engineer...ah... I never managed to even build a chair using my mechanical set. So engineering was out of question. I probably wanted to be an astronaut to escape the boredom of school. But after school I realised that it was hard work. And proceeding in this manner I exhausted all the opprtunties listed in the book. Period.

As I grew up I began having problems with the rhetorical question. Why should what shall I be, be a question regards profession? I felt it was typical of a middle class Indian's obsession with Work. Thomas Friedmann may be in awe about how Indians don't mind working for 100 hours a week...I am not. Born in South, into what considers itself an upwardly mobile community, I have generally been an odd man out. I mean I was pretty hard working at an age when boys consider it girlish to study well. My zeal for knowledge was high and I did fairly well in sports too. But the paradise was lost during class 11 and class 12. My friends got serious about studies and post school life, while I became more of a rebel. And by choosing to do physics and ignoring engineering altogether, I became offically an outcaste. After three to four years of being an outcaste, I scraped through into IIT. And lo and behold my social status improved atleast ten-fold. But then I was back to doing what i did best, rebelling and theorising even as my academics went downhill. But my English and Analytical mediocrity got me into one of India's leading software companies. I took the job because my physics was somewhere down the hill out of sight. But then a year of being the "cream of the cream" as the HR used to call us (nasty sense of humour you know), took its toll on me and I quit to rejoin physics. But even that did not happen without me taking a detour into wildlife conservation, a course I should have pursued, but dropped out at the last moment (intha maari nerangalthaan arivu irukkana santhegam varathu..). Till 25, I was firm believer in Sarah Harding's comment in Crichton's Lost World, "You never know what you want to be till you are 25". But then 25 came and went and even after an year I was still wondering what i would like to do all my life. Money failed to motivate me. I had zero ambition. I live in the present and do not intend accummulate for my grandson. You may choose to call it zest for socialism or plain laziness.

That being the short history of my adventures in choosing a job, I am still stuck with the question, what shall I be. Of course I fancy writing. The fly in the ointment is that the literary world does not reciprocate my feeling. So as the literary cognoscenti continue to ignore me, I am forced to look for jobs elsewhere. Maybe you can help me get one. Here is the criteria. 8 hours of work per day. Five days a week only. No boss required. And that is a necessary condition. Performance should not be rated. Prefer to live on campus. Access to libraries and books is a necessary condition. Work skills involve ability to sleep well and argue and moralise on topics on which I am not particularly moral about. Salary is negotiable as long as the food is free. TV and other recreational sources not required. An outlet for self expression is a must. Now maybe the smart folks who glean some inspiration from this blog can help me find a job with that profile. While at it, maybe you people can find out whether there are any "Head of State" vacancies.

So it is that trivial an issue ?

noreply@blogger.com (mutRupuLLi) — Mon, 18 May 2009 13:51:00 +0000

"Tamils complain of marginalisation at the hands of successive governments led by the Sinhalese majority, which came to power at independence in 1948 and took the favoured position the Tamils had enjoyed under the British colonial government"
---C. Bryson Hull and Ranga Sirilal, Yahoo India News

To the best of my knowledge this takes the cake in terms of "awful" journalism in recent times.

PS :(Well wait I saw something on the TOI about the barter system..I'll dig that up and come back..)

NAGESH.....

noreply@blogger.com (mutRupuLLi) — Sun, 01 Feb 2009 05:48:00 +0000

We owe a lot to this man...for sprinkling in many a mundane and weary life a few moments of worryless mirth....Mikka nanri thalaiva...

(The choice of the picture was deliberate.....this man could make "god" laugh..)

"Guidelines for Tamil movie makers" ,circa 2020

noreply@blogger.com (mutRupuLLi) — Thu, 01 Jan 2009 11:22:00 +0000

The following document is a copy of a proposed state legislation from the year 2020, titled
"Guideline for Tamil moviemakers of 2020 and beyond.....".
I just happen to return from the future and brought this along with me. I hereby officially join Abdul Kalam in eagerly waiting for 2020.

1. Only real life Hindus shall play Hindus on screens. Similarly only Muslims shall play Muslims and Christians shall play Christians. Brahmins have to be played only by Brahmins and Thevars only by Thevars. And same holds for other castes too.
2. Only Tamils shall play Tamil. Non-tamils should play non-tamil's roles only.
3. No negative character shall be named after Gods or Godesses or mythological characters. So names like Ram, Sita, Ramesh, Mahesh, Murugan, Kumarsamy, Kandasamy, Padayappa, Rajeshwari, Lakshmi, Umadevi and so on are banned. Further if any character is shown having even one bad characteristic, then he/she should not be named after Gods and Godesses. There are a plethora of other names like A, Pi, Sqrroot, theta, gamma, alpha, onnu, rendu, athu, ithu, ivan avan, aval, porul,ange, inge, etc that can be used. Same rule holds for Muslim and Christian names too.
4.Also no one including alcoholics should be shown drinking. Same for smoking. Sex can only be implied, as has always been the case.
5.No woman shall be shown in bad light. This requires that women will always be good characters and will never play a negative role. Further all women shall wear traditional decent dresses only. No exposure of skin (except face and hands upto elbows) shall be allowed. Dream sequences as norm are excepted.
6.Family values will always be upheld in movies. So family members shall not be shown in any sort of bad light.
7.NRI's should not be shown in bad light. Especially the rich ones. This is bad for the stock marke and the country's economy.
8.Because of strategic relationships with USA and Isreal, no American or Israeli citizen shall be shown in bad light. And similarly no Pakistani shall be shown in good light.
9.Corporates shall not be shown in any kind of unfavourable vein. Also rich industrialists shall not be portrayed in any unflattering form. Such acts are bad for the economy.
10.Since Hindus believe that food and paper are very sacred, scenes displaying tearing them, stamping on them, throwing them etc won't be allowed.
11. Old people will always be shown respectfully in movies. So even if an old man is shot with a Bofors tank at almost point blank range, the man will fall at the same spot. Also no old person (55 years for women and enuch and 60 for men) shall be shown in bad light.
12. Similarly Politicians, government workers, police and army and ex-army personnel, lawyers, doctors,farmers, bankers, software engineers, BPO employees, scientists and filmmakers shall not be shown in bad vein.
13. State and society (past, present or future) as entities shall not be criticised in any manner.
14. It is expected that movies will generally help towards making a better, brighter and happier community and promote peace and harmony. So it is advised that only such stories be filmed only in such manner lest any one feels hurt, embarassed or unhappy.
15. As a special gesture we would like to honour Mr Vikraman, whose films have followed most of the above rules, even without our asking him to do so. If only all the movie makers had emulated Vikraman, such guidelines would become unnecessary.

Aaaha kilambitaanya kilambittanya

noreply@blogger.com (mutRupuLLi) — Thu, 01 Jan 2009 09:39:00 +0000

Kodana kodi rasigaigalin vendukolukku inanga.......
"meendum mutRupuLLi...."
Viraivil ungal pakkathu blog'il...

More fools we

noreply@blogger.com (mutRupuLLi) — Wed, 13 Aug 2008 08:52:00 +0000

There are three kinds of fools in the world. People who believe China is Communist. And people who believe China is Communist.And then there is a minority of one who think that a 4 week visit to Beijing to attend a summer school makes them competent enough to comment on the economic and social policies of China.
Kali muthiduthu......

A general quiz by any other name......

noreply@blogger.com (mutRupuLLi) — Tue, 06 May 2008 09:03:00 +0000

will still be a general quiz. It can never be a Books Quiz. What we had last weekend at Bharatiya Vidya Bhavan were two Open General quizzes, one which went curiously went with the name of Books Quiz. Samanth Subrmanian's quiz was a pseudo books quiz. Mind you I am not criticising the standard of the questions, but the questions themselves. The prelims was literarly non-literary. Samanth had very smartly explained at the beginning that any written word would be treated as literature, which is fine. But somehow the choice of questions made me feel that the questions normally asked had just been repackaged with a different name. And needless to say we had the usual finalists on stage, making this another session of good quizzing, but not so engaging for the non-finalists. BTW for the record I am pissed off with seeing the same goshti's at all the quiz finals. I have come up with some rules to plainly make it more even a contest and more entertaining. Will write about it at some point.

A real life hero

noreply@blogger.com (mutRupuLLi) — Mon, 11 Feb 2008 04:50:00 +0000

Day and Night Tests? What the $#%&

noreply@blogger.com (mutRupuLLi) — Wed, 19 Dec 2007 08:05:00 +0000

"I wish people would leave Test cricket alone and keep their tinkering to the limited-overs game. What they need to do, if they think they aren't getting enough crowds, is to play less of the damn thing so that when a Test series comes around, people will want to see it instead of saying, 'Just another Test'."...Michael Holding as quoted by Sambit Bal, Courtesy Cricinfo.

Attaboy Mikey. Guess it takes a fast bowler to "bang" in some sense when administrators decide to tamper with the fairer version of the game.

Chomsky and Co clarify

noreply@blogger.com (mutRupuLLi) — Thu, 13 Dec 2007 08:09:00 +0000

I received this from the Initative India google group, to which I subscribe.

We are taken aback by a widespread reaction to a statement we made with the best of intentions, imploring a restoration of unity among the left forces in India –a reaction that seems to assume that such an appeal to overcome divisions among the left could only amount to supporting a very specific section of the CPM in West Bengal. Our statement did not lend support to the CPM's actions in Nandigram or its recent economic policies in West Bengal, nor was that our intention. On the contrary, we asserted, in solidarity with its Left critics both inside and outside the party, that we found them tragically wrong. Our hope was that Left critics would view their task as one of putting pressure on the CPM in West Bengal to correct and improve its policies and its habits of governance, rather than dismiss it wholesale as an unredeemable party. We felt that we could hope for such a thing, of such a return to the laudable traditions of a party that once brought extensive land reforms to the state of West Bengal and that had kept communal tensions in abeyance for decades in that state. This, rather than any exculpation of its various recent policies and actions, is what we intended by our hopes for 'unity' among the left forces.

We realize now that it is perhaps not possible to expect the Left critics of the CPM to overcome the deep disappointment, indeed hostility, they have come to feel towards it, unless the CPM itself takes some initiative against that sense of disappointment. We hope that the CPM in West Bengal will show the largeness of mind to take such an initiative by restoring the morale as well as the welfare of the dispossessed people of Nandigram through the humane governance of their region, so that the left forces can then unite and focus on the more fundamental issues that confront the Left as a whole, in particular focus on the task of providing with just and imaginative measures an alternative to neo-liberal capitalism that has caused so much suffering to the poor and working people in India.

Signed

Michael Albert, Tariq Ali, Akeel Bilgrami, Victoria Brittain, Noam Chomsky, Charles Derber, Stephen Shalom

Why read Financial Times?

noreply@blogger.com (mutRupuLLi) — Fri, 07 Dec 2007 03:41:00 +0000

Naomi Klein explains why she reads Financial Times . Chomsky had something similar to say about Wall Street Journal.

Despondence galore...

noreply@blogger.com (mutRupuLLi) — Sat, 24 Nov 2007 08:12:00 +0000

Ok I will break my silence. I am shocked at CPI(M)'s take and handling of the events happening in Nandigram. I am a bit of a communist but am not a Communist. I believe that concentration of power, either with state or corporate entities would almost always lead to sickening results and loss of freedom. I also believe that left thought should work towards a heirarchy less structure with a more equitable distribution of resources. That one of the more sensible groups in the Indian political spectrum is involved in this sickening display of state power to subdue and subjugate the very people, whom it is supposed to represent(more so than in the nonleft states) makes me despondent. That the masses will lose faith in Left thought and what it represents would probably be one of the most disheartening outcome of the whole event. What made me feel worse was the lukewarm response of that most respected and fearless intellectual Noam Chomsky. Even acknowledging the various forces out to damage the Left (of which there are more than plenty) and the global importance of the need to preserve the Left experiment here and elsewhere, the situation still demanded a stronger admonishment of the State machinery from the noted anarchist. Chomsky Sir, I am disappointed, to say the least.

Having said this, the protests of the people and the intelligensia of Bengal is heartening and surely a healthy sign, for where there is no honest dissent, there can be no Left. A case in point, the absolute lack of spine and dissent culture in the land of one of the earliest dissenter, Nakkeeran,be it the ecologically disastrous and economically unviable Sethusamudram (the only protest is on religious grounds supported by a party which believes that displacing people without adequate and proper compensation, submerging forests and destroying natural heritage is the only way towards progress, even while the religion they claim to protect actually condemns such practices very severely.So much for being religious) or the Khusboo issue or the Dinakaran murders.

Yuvraj, Tirupathi and Chaos theory

noreply@blogger.com (mutRupuLLi) — Tue, 25 Sep 2007 04:38:00 +0000

Yet another example of chaos theory at work...India wins 20-20 nonsense(20-20 can be equated to Yuvan's music. You listen to the Dad and on that confidence you listen to the son and you soon wonder what made you assume that something might have rubbed on to the son from the Dad) and you have BCCI and government pouring money on our cricketers. In the bygone ages of amateurs and quasi professionals, when cricket was nowhere near as lucrative as it is these days, when cricketers were not omnipresent, it made sense to gift land, money or a job to these achievers, thereby adding some security to their life. But how sensible is it to pour lakhs on the overpaid millionaire cricketers of the current age who in addition to having lucrative contracts with BCCI also earn a fortune through advertisements. This even when the average Ranji trophy and league cricketers gets paid pittance. But then we make traditions of these things don't we. We would only add money into the super rich coffers of Tirupathi as offerings while allowing the classic temples in and around Tanjavaur, Chidambaram and Kumbakonam to lie in ruins. If even in the realm of gods some are MORE equal than others, what can the poor Ranj Trophy cricketer expect.

Coming to the reference of Chaos theory at work, these days modellers use Chaos theory to model and explain why some movies become super hits, why some books become ultra popular and so on. And what is generally found is, that there is a positive feedback at work. So if there is some initial advantage, that advantage tends to increase subsequently and in the absence of external intervention there is a runaway. People try to apply this to ecological and economic networks. For eg I remember one talk, where the speaker used agent based interaction models to explain why laissez faire capitalism actually would soon lead to money in the hands of few while all the rest would become pennyless. It might be a very simplified model, but it gives one insight into how complex unbridled systems evolve naturally. My guess (or insight) is that this phenomenon can be applied to why some temples are more popular and why some cricketers get porsches even while others struggle to make ends meet. Even as I explained all this to my mother, she gave me a look of surprise and said our ancestors made this observation ages back and hence the oft repeated "panam panathoda thaaan serum"(money will only marry money). I tell you, these old people are out to get me.

Imsai of anachronisms

noreply@blogger.com (mutRupuLLi) — Mon, 17 Sep 2007 03:21:00 +0000

Ok this is not a review of Imsai Arasan nor is this about Vadivelu's drunken antics. And neither is it about kalaignar TV (though I am gald to see Yuhi Sethu back in action).

Coming to the point, there are some very interesting things about Chimbudevan's Imsai, that as far as I can recall not many people seemed to have noticed. Now that is just another way of bragging that I noticed something in the movie. But hey what is a blog for if I am not allowed some self indulgence.

There are some very interesting anachronisms in the movie. The funniest being the final speech by the Ahimsai Arasan (ie the reformed Imsai Arasan), wherein he says "Maaveeran Alexanderpol, Samrat Ashokarpol.....Braveheart Mel Gibsonpol...." And then there is the Arasan's face morphed onto Brucelee's body. The best anachronism is not actually funny. but is a piece of smart work arising from conventional ignorance. It is basically Nasser's reaction to the Thambi Vadivelu's comment "maatram ondruthaaan marathuiruppathu" (Change is the only thing that does not change). Now this is a quote which is usually incorrectly attributed to Karl Marx, while it predates him by atleast a thousand years or more. But assuming that Marx made such a comment or was the first to use that phrase, Nasser's reaction to it is interesting. He gives a very surprised look and says, "...Ange thottu Inge thottu, athaiyum padithu vittaya.." ("Have you read that too..?"). The reference is to Marx and his works. But the story happens in the 1790's and not the in the 19th century. So Nasser does not refer to Marx by name.

For God's Sake........

noreply@blogger.com (mutRupuLLi) — Fri, 07 Sep 2007 07:05:00 +0000

Forget about listening to the way "Madrasis" pronounce it...Can't people even read properly from the Menu. For the millionth time....
It is NOT Dosa......It is Dosai....
It is NOT Vada......It is Vadai....
Just as it not Poora, but Poori....

I rest my case M'lud.

The most unjust legal system

noreply@blogger.com (mutRupuLLi) — Fri, 31 Aug 2007 03:42:00 +0000

I never realised how cruel the Indian legal system was. Two events then happened that changed my mind forever. I owe a lot to the TV channels for opening my eyes. Here were two men sentenced to jail. One for being in possession of illegal weapons like AK56(athu oru bayangaramana machine gun). And the other for killing a state protected endangered Chinkara and Black Buck. The former, on whom a 1.5 billion rupees industry depends upon, had to pay a hefty fine of Rs 25000. Poor Sanjay, can't imagine how he managed to save that large an amount from the paltry sum he gets for being the prime man in a 1.5 billion rupees industry. The media quite rightly kept harping on the billion rupees figure. After all in a capitalist democracy a person's worth depends on his/her wealth.

And Salman, poor fella was treacherously misled into thinking that shooting "voiceless" Black bucks was good sport. After all unlike the guys on the platform whom he drove over earlier, the Chinkaras and Black bucks wouldn't drag him to court. The bloody Chinkaras and Black bucks played foul. How was he to know that there were thinks in the world called endangered species, people like Belinda Wright, organisations like WPSI and laws against poaching. Poor Salman.

The perusu's of our land can go on and on about freedom fighters and kalapani and murky cells in Andaman. But can all those people's suffering compare with the sufferings (mental and physical) of these two men. How many times did Sanjay have to appear in court. Has anyone in India suffered as much as this man. Tell me what should poor Salman do...he is fined for driving over sleeping people, he is not allowed to kill black bucks and chinkaras, he is not allowed to call up on women and pain them. God forbid, he may be soon asked to start wearing shirts. Are we living in a fascist country? And think of the families. These two had sisters to look after. And worse still they had parents too. And as Sanjay pointed out, they are the lone "bread winners" of the family. Surely no one else in the country has so many issues to deal with.

It is yet again to the media's credit that it has been holding the spotlight on the inhuman sufferings of these entertainers, provoking some wonderful response from the chagrined public. One need just look at how the people of the nation have reacted to the state atrocities. I myself have been thinking of sending messages like these to people concerned. "Release Sanjay immediately. Is it Sanjay's fault that he possessed illegal weapons. If a poor man can flaunt a Bazooka on Screen, why can't he have a AK56 in his house. Throw the stupid communists out of the country?" "If Salmaan can't kill Chinkara Maan for fun...What the ***k maan?" What we need today are more such messages and letters, condemning such inhuman, soul wrecking injustice. We after all live in a civilised society.

1..2..3..CHO

noreply@blogger.com (mutRupuLLi) — Fri, 24 Aug 2007 09:00:00 +0000

“Communists are opportunists” declares Cho, in his Vikatan interview, summarising his view on how the left have reacted to the nuclear deal. He cites the Left’s stand (or absence of it) on Chinese aggression in the North East as the justification for his comment. But surprisingly he spares the BJP of the adjective. In fact to a general question on opposition to the deal, he does not even mention the principal opposition party which is opposing the deal just like the Left. Actually coming from Cho, that is not surprising. For Cho, and others who think like him, BJP’s opposition to the nuclear deal is not opportunistic. That the BJP, had it been the ruling party, would have most likely gone ahead with the deal does not enter into the minds of these Left bashers. For these enlightened people, if Left opposes something on an ideological basis(hypocritical or not), it is opportunism. If the Right does the same, it is because the poor things are forced to do it because of political compulsion. What can the hypocrisy be in that!!!!!

Actually this sort of attitude tells a lot more about the sort of people we are. Take a stand on the basis of a belief or ideology and you will be hated. Take a stand when it suits you and dump it when it doesn’t and you can escape with just a tap on the wrist. You might even be voted to power next time. Ideologies are vulgar and hypocrisy is noble. How much more Victorian can we be?

Courtesy Blog

noreply@blogger.com (mutRupuLLi) — Thu, 09 Aug 2007 11:59:00 +0000

What's a poosra in cricket terminology?
That is the doosra which guys like Marlon Samuels and Shahid Afridi bowl or rather pelt. Hence poosra -----Courtesy the "commie" Rum Shop CarribeanCricket.com

Interestingly the Rum Shop forum on Carribean Cricket is just like TFM forum. And by definition forums can be this way only.---Courtesy mutRupuLLi.

Forum'la satham pesaravanoda pechu thaan edupaduthu. anga nesam sethhu poguthu.---Courtesy the late Maaya Thevar

EKSI :( --- Courtesy soonapaana

Magsaysay for Sainath

noreply@blogger.com (mutRupuLLi) — Wed, 01 Aug 2007 05:52:00 +0000

I have met "educated" and "knowledgeable" people who think that 95% of Indians can and do broswe internet regularly. There are others who think that Indians embrace inter-caste and inter-religion marriages the way Reaganites embraced terrorism, the state variety ie. And still others believe that Indian is SHINING. It is in the face of such ignorance that P.Sainath's continuing work becomes profoundly important. People like Sainath and Gurumurthy are probably the last information link between the urban "educated" class and the poor rural Indian. Sainath, an absolutely deserving receipient of the Ramon Magsaysay award.

My experiment with physics

noreply@blogger.com (mutRupuLLi) — Sun, 22 Jul 2007 06:33:00 +0000

If you are steadfast in your aim in experimenting with the physicists and lab attendents, even while the people around you are losing their heads over experiments with inanimate molecules and face less atoms, then you will be Sridhar my Son. Now that is what Rudyard Kipling might have said IF he had known me. But since he didn’t have the good fortune, I will bear the cross of narrating my own experiments with physicists, pertaining specifically to the time I spent in the labs of the physics department at IIT Madras.

As our old friend Sai would put it, lab is the place where most Indian men learn the art of cooking. Even Meenakshi Ammal’s Samaithu Paar (1) would not teach one more than what one learns cooking at the physics lab. It is only when one gets deep into the art of manipulating and fixing data that one really begins to appreciate nature in her full grandeur. And added to it there is always more thrill in playing with numbers and data than merely noting down values from the Voltmeter and Ammeter.

When the enthusiastic experimenter is alphabetically placed next to two of the more beautiful girls in the class and thereby gets to spend a lot of the time with them, it can come as no surprise that he would spend more time in trying to understand them than the time he would spend in understanding the physics behind the experiment. Needless to say he was the Kadalaimamani(2) of the class. (Critics may argue that the title does not make sense, as the experimenter was the one who was busy talking. The girls themselves were busy doing the actual experiment. Monologues do not qualify as kadalai, they would say. But then critics are asses.) The negative side of this zeal on the chronicler's part in "putting kadalai" as the terminology goes, was the Stomach Plasma (3) that this act generated in the fellow males of the class. But then that was just yet another cross one had to bear in public life. But even the most severe critic of the chronicler would not deny that the man was always a perfect gentleman what with zealously following the 3 golden rules of the flirting Gentleman viz, Kadalai, Ganniyam, Kattupadu (4).

No lab is complete without the lab instructor and the lab attender. The lab in charge during the chronicler’s stay at IIT was a man who has to be seen to be believed. It would be more difficult to find a man who is so confident of his own knowledge, so much so that he starts every conversation with an I KNOW SIR, I KNOW. Probably he was the inspiration for the famous Raghuvaran sequence in Puriyatha Puthir(5). So much was his confidence that the historian once even saw him waving aside a speeding lorry with a casual wave of the hand as he was crossing the Sardar Patel Road. Anyway it was just a matter of seconds for Sana and Sai to name him DINOUSAUR to rhyme with his punch dialogue. The thing with having the man around in the lab was that the experiments never got done, because this man’s antics kept one laughing all the while. Add to that the wisecracks and witty comments from the PJ God Sana and Mokkai God(5) Sai and you know why the chronicler had to slog all night the day before the exams to complete the record note book on time.

Physics labs are generally less noisy, less smelly and less of a visual treat. There is nothing burning, no smell of rotten eggs and no squeals and screams that as a rule permeate the chemistry lab when frivolous experimenters accidentally consume oxalic acid through the pipette or pour CONC HCL on the neighbour’s hand bag. Nor is it the place where biologists murder poor rats and guinea pigs in the name of science and progress. Instead it is the place where the truly noble work gets done; work which adds meaning to human life and makes world a better place to live in. Like atom bombs and search for extraterrestrial life. Ofcourse all labs don’t get to make bombs. Not enough funds you see. Some of us just have to be satisfied in measuring the refractive index of water or the viscosity of oil.

References:(For the benefit of my gazillion non tamil speaking readers)

(1) Samaithu Paar: This is a classic cook book which is supposed to come to the rescue of many a newly wed bride. A translated version called "Cook and See" is also supposed to be available. The logical question arising is why should one see or what should one see after cooking. I guess the reference is to the seeing and driving part while going to a hotel after the cooking and the throwing away is done.

(2)Kadalaimamani: A take on Kalaimamani awards. Kadalai or putting kadalai is the process of flirting.

(3) Stomach Plasma: Shakespeare called it green eyed monster. Being physics students we call it Stomach Plasma. This is what someone succintly put as "all the fun you think they had".

(4) Kadalai Ganniyam Kaatupadu: Translated this means Dalliance (or as a verb Dally with) Dignity and Discipline. A take on the famous Dravidian motto, Kadamai Ganniyam Kattupadu.(Duty Dignity and Discipline).

(5)Puriyatha Puthir: A thriller released in the early 90's. There is a famous sequence when the Villian (Raghuvaran) suspicious of his wife, vents his irritation and sarcasm just by mouthing "I KNOW" in various ways. A very different thriller, this movie did rather badly and the director(K.S Ravikumar) probably went on to make movies like Nattamai, Periya Kudumbam, Honest Raj etc as an act of vengeance.

Kattabomman & Single Vadai

noreply@blogger.com (mutRupuLLi) — Wed, 11 Jul 2007 07:15:00 +0000

What happens if after seeing Veerapandiya kaatabomman for the 50th time you go to Ratna Cafe and order one ordinary sized vadai....(and return 10.50 INR poorer)? You get to speak such dialogues......

"Malivana hotel endra ondru than illai ichennai maanagarile....Sarvana Bhavan ondru thaan arjaka costly endru ninaithen. Athu malivana hotel endru nirupithvittathu, emathu arumai hotel...velacherry 100 feet salayil ulla triplicane ratna cafe."

Venneer with Panneer -3

noreply@blogger.com (mutRupuLLi) — Fri, 15 Jun 2007 05:59:00 +0000

VKR—that much laid back actor

I chanced upon V.K.Ramaswamy's (VKR) autobiography (I think it was titled “enathu thiraipayanam”) at the Velacherry Government Library. The book had forewords by many leading men of Tamil cinema, like AVM Saravanan, Cho, Rajini, Kamal and others . All of them had something good to say about VKR. What Kamal had written piqued my interest. The result is this post, a recollection of the VKR I have enjoyed on screen.

Kamal had compared VKR to Groucho Marx and Oliver Hardy. I have not seen much of Oliver Hardy, so can't say anything about that comparison except that VKR sharing his girth with Oliver probably shared the same stand and deliver style.(Sve Sekar is another actor who used this style to good use). But comparison with Groucho was both surprising and (coming to think of it) very apt. Groucho though starting in the silent era depended heavily on dialogues. He was a master at ad-libbing, with an ability to be devastatingly insulting and humorous at the same time. From the outside that looks very unVKRish. But then Kamal's comment probably was motivated by VKR's tendency to be surprisingly sarcastic and funny without even faintly making the effort to be so. A case in point is the scene in Unnal Mudiyum Thambi. VKR is a MP passing through a village with his coterie of assistants. Their car stops near the fields. And VKR gets down from the car and tears open a biscuit packet and throws the covering paper on the road. A villager standing nearby objects to this and asks him to throw the paper into the dustbin. VKR's assistant bends to pick the paper, but the villager stops him and asks VKR himself to pick it up as he had dropped the waste on the road. So VKR bends to pick the paper and while doing so comments nonchalantly...... “Unga oorula maadu thaanoda saanaththa thane kondu poi kuppa thottiyila poduma ....???” Yet another example is from Ooty Varai Uravu,one of the many Sivaji Muthuraman starrers. VKR, (Muthurman's father) wants Vijayalakshmi(Muthuraman's lady love, acting as amnesia patient) out of his house. Sivaji and Muthuraman try to cajole Vijayalakshmi to sit and eat something .

Vijaya:. Ninnute sapaddalame? (Can't I stand and eat)
Sivaji: Oh yes... Ninnute sapaddalame (Yes you can stand and eat)
Vijaya:. Nadanthute sapaddalame? (Can't I walk while eating)
Sivaji : Oh yes Nadanthute sapaddalame (Yes you can walk and eat too)
Vijaya: Oditte Sapadalame? (Can't I run and eat)
VKR : Sappataparam Odidalame ? ( You can eat and run away too..)

The last line by VKR comes as a surprise and the sarcasm strikes a bit slowly but when it does one just can't help laughing out loud.

Unlike Nagesh, VKR was not very keen to use the screen space. A typical Nagesh scene would involve him moving around a lot. Like Saqlain Mushtaq, Nagesh was a master in using the space available to him. VKR was more like John Emburey. He would just stand in a place and talk. VKR fans might not like the comparison though. Emburey was after all an English off spinner, a species as pathetic as an Indian fast bowler or a West Indian leg spinner. But that comparison was only regards their mobility and not their quality.

VKR typically would sit on the sofa/chair or at the most stand at the same place throughout the scene. But that was more than enough space for him, because his skill lay in the outstanding sense of timing. He would always be spot on in his timing and his dialogues in tandem with Nagesh would invariably be a riot, what with both trying to out do each other. In Rudra Thandavam(VKR's home production) VKR plays Lord Shiva and Nagesh a poor priest. Their conversation is very humorous, engaging and also gives an insight into VKR's political views. Dravidian politicians of that time clamoured for a separate Tamil land. Nagesh questions Lord Shiva(VKR) on this. VKR proceeds to use the slightly flawed but very humorous example of the Masala Vadai to ridicule the seperatists argument.

My personal favourites are his classic role as Nambi Anne in Fazil's Arangetra Velai( remake of Fazil's Ramoji Rao Speaking) and the cameo as an MP in Vikram. When the missile (Agniputra) is stolen, the chiefs of the armed forces and the intelligent bureau get together for a top secret meeting. VKR enters the room and welcomes the Navy Admiral with ...”Enna Kappal, Sowkiyama” and then gives the classic reply on being informed about the stolen missile (or rocket as VKR is told by the chief of staff)..... ”Rocket'a....athu Sivkasi samcharam”. But then Sujatha (dialogue writer for Vikram) reserves the best till the last. A visibly worried VKR enquires about the missile....”Antha Missile inga vedicha Ambur vara kekkuma...”...This perplexes the Chief of Staff... Then VKR proceeds to explain...”....illai anga ennakku oru karumbu thottam irrukku, athan ketten”.

Great Indian Cinema Quiz

noreply@blogger.com (mutRupuLLi) — Tue, 05 Jun 2007 06:26:00 +0000

Too many sappai questions in the Great Indian Cinema Quiz. The questions were based on only Tamil and Hindi films, with probably 3 exceptions. Both Sana and I knew next to nothing about the Hindi filma questions that were asked. But the Tamil movie questions were generally very very answerable. Atleast I got a lot of answers in the finals. A big pity we didn't have a third member with some Hindi fundaes. We might have made it to the final.

There was not a single question asked on Vijaykanth or the Maestro. Now that is a big time sin. Otherwise it was good fun at Tatvaloka on Sunday morning.

PS: Now I shall never understand this concept of corporate religiosity or corporate spirituality. Tatvaloka had huge pictures of Shringeri Acharyas and a sculptor of Adi Shankara. But it is a fully air conditioned hall with smooth flooring, slick chairs and car parking basement. Somehow I fail to see what is Hindu or spiritual about all these things.

kathai keLu, kathai keLu

noreply@blogger.com (mutRupuLLi) — Fri, 01 Jun 2007 08:13:00 +0000

Story telling is a passion with me. It is not that I am an expert narrator. I certainly do not enthrall my audience. People have criticised that I am a downright bad speaker, what with a craving to push in as many words as possible within the unforgiving minute and a tendency to mix my own insights with the actual story. (Intha insight, outsight ellam where disappearing when it comes to my research is something which my guide would like to know). But inspite of my critics and the hostile attitude of listeners I literally live to tell a tale.

I have found children to be the most stringent examiners of my narrative abilities. They love listening to stories and they keep me on my toes by reacting spontaneously. If they don't like a story or think they would be better off else where, they don't suddenly remember that they forgot their keys and ask to be excused. They just leave. But when they are enjoying it, their shining faces are a sight to behold. Many have been the happy hours that I have spent telling stories to my little cousins, nieces, and other kids.

Narration is an art. The audience has to be under the narrator's spell. One has to ensure that not a word is missed, not an emotion lost and not a joke unlaughed. Kodambakkam directors are invariably master story tellers. What they can't get right in the movies, they actually do when they narrate the story to our heroes. And so confident are they of the different fare they are providing, that when interviwed on sets, they invariably say: "Ithu oru different'ana subject...tamil'la intha mathiri kadhai vanthathe kidyadhu......." The Friday review would reveal this different movie to be a college campus love story between a rich girl and poor boy, with the love triumphing at the end. Very different indeed.

But maybe that is doing an injustice to these master narrators. Many a hero falls for the narration skills of these men. The best illustration of how a story is told in Kodambakkam is the scene from Kadhalikka Neram Illai, where Nagesh narrates a horror story to Balaiah. By the end of the scene Balaiah is no more knowledgable about the story than he was at the beginning, because Nagesh's narration actually narrates nothing. He just descibes the scene and describes it well enough to frighten Balaiah big time, just the way any Kodambakkam director/story teller worth his salt would. No wonder Vijaykanth keeps remaking so many of his movies.

And this capacity to mesmerise through real/virtual story telling comes as no wonder, because story telling is something Indians have always been very good at. Indians have a rich heritage of story telling. Stories have been always been a medium of instruction. Stories were used to pass down values from one generation to next. In the bygone ages when values and morals did not change as fast as they do today, stories no doubt helped patch up small gaps between generations. When he sits down to create and narrate stories, sky is the limit for the Indian story teller. He lets the horse of imagination free to wander. Stuff like censor, morals, values actually take a backstage as the horse gallops across the rich terrain of imagination. And the resulting output is a rich collection of stories ranging from the fantastic to the absurd. From the educational Panchtantra, to romantic Kadambari(which is a story labyrinth, what with story inside a story inside a story inside a....). From the Hindu Mahabharata, to the Buddhist Jataka. From the intellectual Vikram and Vetal tales to the deeply sarcastic Parmartha Guru tales by Veera Maamunivar.

Ofcourse story telling is not every one's cup of tea. There is a large population out there who can't tell a tale crisply and engagingly. Many a wannabe story teller can only do a "avan enna sonnanu'na....athu vanthu.....ithunuttan....athavathu vanthu...aven...." type job. If this person is your guest or social superior or worse if he is your boss, you are in big trouble. But actually in the Industrial age, there exists a separate industry for the employment of such human rambams. Mega serials, they call it.

PS: After reading the prepost one of my friends asked me whether the last paragraph was autobiographical. Maybe he be torn apart by a Velociraptor.